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April 2nd, 2014

women and men

during my first trimester i didn't really do much thinking about the pregnancy, and some of it was to protect myself.

but the second trimester, it really starts to sink in. i'm pregnant. there's a baby in there. now and then i feel her wriggle. not very often since i have a front placenta and it's still early.

and it was like a switch turned on in my brain. i've spent a lot of time thinking about the baby. thinking about making room for her. reading up on births. on parenting. i've set up lunch dates with mothers or expectant moms. i've talked to a lot of women. i made friends with a neighbor just because she had a 1 year old.

it's basically a completely new field for me.

and andy. he's like, just the same. kinda like i was at my first trimester. he knows we're having a baby, maybe read the occasional baby article, a few chapters of a book now and then, but his life goes on. the baby doesn't take over his life.

he's working more, to make more money, but it does make him feel a bit more distant, and when he comes home, he is tired and needs to chill out with tv and computer.

he still hasn't felt the baby kick. i've felt her kick against my hand about three times now, but andy hasn't.

i guess it's just the way it goes. it's hard to forget that i've a baby. she's kicking a bit right now. i pee a lot, almost every hour when i'm hydrating well.

i wake up in the middle of the night to pee once or twice. i'm uncomfortable.

my belly is uncomfortable. i'm ungainly. i've hormones making me cry easier, and i rage. i'm tired a lot.

i pant, because breathing is harder.

but for the expecting father, his body doesn't remind him constantly. his living is unchanged. except he has a wife who is changing and uncomfortable and unhappy and joyful and just all over the place.

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