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Apparently, when you usually just post happy and funny facebook posts, and write something negative, people get concerned. Which is very touching in a way. I had stipulated that I only wanted to to talk to pregnant women, and several called me or PM-ed me. I think I would've gotten even more out reach if I hadn't said that. And someone sent me cookie and ice-cream delivery.

Yesterday was a really rough day. And so it finally spilled over on facebook. Livejournal really has shielded my facebook friends.

I didn't really get into it that much on my FB status. But basically my blood pressure is stressing me out. And so are my midwives. If you had asked me before I got pregnant what pregnancy issue I may be facing, blood pressure would so not be my guess. I have had really low blood pressure all my life. And at my 33 week checkup it spiked by 15 points, which caused my midwives to freak out. And I've had a bunch of blood work done, so far results are normal. However, with blood pressure there is a chance that it may spike again, and then what would we do? There is a chance that we may risk out of a homebirth and then I will be with a new provider at 40 weeks or something. It's just freaking stressful. At the home visit at 36 weeks, the midwife told me: "Keep proving to us that you're not pre-eclamptic."

Later yesterday Andy and I had a fight over hospital and home births. He had always been the person that pushed for a home birth. And who doesn't want a birth at home with your bed and your stuff and your cat? Now that we've been in the "birth" world more, we've heard good things about a Dr Sebestyan in OB North, but we picked the obamacare insurance with the hospital closest to us. So I don't think OB North is covered. If she is, I would seriously consider a provider transfer.

It's just a lot of stuff. Today I went to the chiropractor to help loosen my ligaments so that the baby would engage. I also went to acupuncture, we've been meeting for my blood pressure. But today we started induction points. I've also started evening primrose oil.

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Comments

ripresa
Jul. 23rd, 2014 04:02 pm (UTC)
He ultimately tells me it's my choice, but him being so against hospitals does color my opinions.

And interesting about the OB and not knowing the doctor who delivers you, I guess that makes sense.

zuleikhajami
Jul. 23rd, 2014 10:25 pm (UTC)
I don't know if we could have done more to try and meet the doctor, but we were pretty blase about the whole thing. We incorrectly believed that I would have a quick and easy labor as my mother did. We pretended we weren't assuming that, but in reality we were. And then I got to have a 30+ hour labor instead.

In retrospect, though, I'm glad we mostly didn't think about how labor would go because even the little bit of stuff we did with a birthing plan and pain management techniques and a labor-and-delivery playlist all ended up feeling ridiculous in the actual moment. What I thought I wanted wasn't what I wanted at all. My biggest issue with hospital birth actually ended up being that the post-partum care was simultaneously too invasive and too hand's off. My hospital did rooming in, but what I actually wanted was for someone else to take care of my baby while I got to sleep. Instead, it felt like there were constant tests of both me and the baby to make sure we were all right and, of course, the constant nursing.
ripresa
Jul. 23rd, 2014 10:28 pm (UTC)
Yeah I have no idea how hands off I want people to be, or how helpful. Andy's mom is coming to help for 2 weeks and she's staying at another place, but I'm not sure how much I would want her help. We'll see!
themooselet
Jul. 24th, 2014 07:10 am (UTC)
Jumping in on this thread to echo zuleikhajami's experience. The situation is probably not very useful to you since I live in Germany, where home births are almost unheard of, and most hospitals strive to keep births unmedicated unless there are clear risks.

FWIW, I also wrote a birth plan with things like no pain medication, low lights, quiet... Three hours into very painful contractions I was BEGGING for an epidural, but the nurses wouldn't give it as I hadn't dilated enough. Instead I got homeopathic drops which did zero. (Eventually the took pity and gave me the epidural, and it was the best decision ever: one hour later I was fully dilated and pushing. The midwive's theory is my sporty nature and good muscle tone made it hard for my body to dilate). Anyway, not for one moment during labour did I think about music or lights or anything else on my birth plan. After the experience and now thinking of a second child, my philosophy is simple: get mom and child alive and healthy, everything else is irrelevant and won't matter even a year later.

My one frustration re hospital stay was also that the nurses insisted so much on rooming in. My baby was NOISY, so I did not sleep for days and was already an exhausted emotional mess when we made it home. Next time I'll ask them to take the baby for a few hours every night!
ripresa
Jul. 24th, 2014 12:51 pm (UTC)
I don't have a birth plan.

Clearly, everyone wants their kid out and healthy.

Especially at this point in my pregnancy, I just want the kid out and healthy :)

However, there are 2 of us in the marriage, and I don't want to upset Andy too much, he doesn't really have strong opinions about a lot of stuff. But he does in this case. If it looks like BP keep spiking we'll transfer to the hospital. But hopefully baby will come before that happens.
themooselet
Jul. 24th, 2014 01:18 pm (UTC)
If my comment offended you in any way, I apologize and take it back. Feel free to delete it. It wasn't meant to be judgmental.

I wish you all the best!
ripresa
Jul. 24th, 2014 01:21 pm (UTC)
Sorry, I'm not offended! Germany definitely has a better system in place for laboring then the US, and I would trust the German hospital birth system better then the US system.
zuleikhajami
Jul. 25th, 2014 02:25 am (UTC)
I have no idea if it's true or not, but I will now also blame my lengthy labor on my sporty nature and good muscle tone. :)
(Anonymous)
Jul. 25th, 2014 04:38 am (UTC)
I know! So much more flattering than my own theory of "too chicken to deal with pain",